January Is National Stalking Awareness Month - Would You Know Stalking If You Saw It?

“Joe seemed like a nice guy. I met him through one of those online dating sites.  I made a mistake and finally gave him my personal email.  Then the emails came fast and furious. It was ‘too much too soon’ so I backed away.   

Now he won’t leave me alone.  I asked for no further contact – but he sent me flowers to my workplace – and I never told him where I work.  I am getting concerned.  My co-workers think I am being silly…but I am not so sure.  What do I do?”

Would you know stalking if you saw it? Would you know it if it was happening to you?

January is National Stalking Awareness Month. Did you know:

·         One in 6 women (16.2%) and 1  in 19 men (5.2%) in the United States have experienced stalking victimization at some point during their lifetime in which they felt very fearful or believed that they or someone close to them would be harmed or killed.

·         Two-thirds (66.2%) of female victims of stalking were stalked by a current or former intimate partner; men were primarily stalked by an intimate partner or an acquaintance, 41.4% and 40.0%, respectively.

·         Repeatedly receiving unwanted telephone calls, voice, or text messages was the most commonly experienced stalking tactic for both female and male victims of stalking (78.8% for women and 75.9% for men).

·         More than half of female victims and more than one-third of male victims of stalking indicated that they were stalked before the age of 25; about 1 in 5 female victims and 1 in 14 male victims experienced stalking between the ages of 11 and 17.

(CDC NISVS Survey, released December 2011)

The National Stalking Awareness Month website has been updated with 2012 materials - including posters, public service announcements, buttons, website banners, and more.

There are also examples of how you can raise awareness about stalking, sample status updates for a variety of social networking sites, and a quiz to check your knowledge on stalking. (I even missed some of the quiz questions!)

Go to www.stalkingawarenessmonth.org to learn more.

For the Presidential Proclamation of National Stalking Awareness Month, click here.

What to do if you are the victim of a stalker

·         If you feel you are in immediate danger, call 9-1-1.

·         Trust your instincts. If you sense you are in danger, you probably are.

·         Tell the stalker "no" only once. Repeatedly saying "no" reinforces the stalking by keeping the stalker engaged. Do not confront or try to bargain with a stalker.

·         Get an answering machine and leave it on your old phone line. Get another unlisted number for your family and friends. Have a friend monitor the answering machine if it is difficult for you. If you close off an avenue to a stalker they will find another which may be worse.

·         Develop a safety plan. Safety plans can includes such things as changing your routes to work, arranging for others to accompany you in public, temporarily staying with friends, planning what you can say if you run into the stalker, keeping an emergency phone nearby.

·         Try to secure your accounts so your stalker cannot access information about you. Change your passwords frequently. Contact the utility companies and set up a password for your account. Block your address at Department of Motor Vehicles. Check with the Secretary of State's office to see if you are eligible for a confidential address.

·         Document everything even if you don't go to the police. Photograph injuries and damages. Ask witnesses to write down what they saw. Keep a log of dates, times, places, and witnesses.

·         Tell others that you are being stalked so that neighbors and co-workers will be alerted not to divulge information and will inform you when he/she is around.

Seek help. Document everything. Take it seriously.

CDC Releases NISVS Findings

  

"On average, 24 people per minute are victims of rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner in the United States. Over the course of a year, that equals more than 12 million women and men. Those numbers only tell part of the story – more than 1 million women reported being raped, and over 6 million women and men were a victim of stalking."

On December 14, the Division for Violence Prevention at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention presented the initial findings from the National Intimate Partner Violence and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS). 

NISVS is an on­going, nationally representative survey that assesses experiences of sexual violence, stalking, and intimate partner violence among adult women and men in the United States. It measures lifetime victimization for these types of violence as well as victimization in the 12 months prior to the survey.

The survey goes beyond counting acts of sexual violence, stalking, and intimate partner violence by assessing the range of violence experienced by victims and the impact of that victimization. The report also includes the first ever simultaneous national and state-level prevalence estimates of these forms of violence for all states.  

The findings show that, on average, 24 people per minute are victims of rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner in the United States.  Over the course of a year, that equals more than 12 million women and men. Those numbers only tell part of the story – more than 1 million women reported being raped, and over 6 million women and men were a victim of stalking.

These findings emphasize that sexual violence, stalking, and intimate partner violence are widespread and a major public health problem in the United States. The report underscores the heavy toll of this violence, particularly on women; the immediate impacts of victimization; and the lifelong health consequences of these forms of violence.  For example:

·         Nearly 1 in 5 women and 1 in 71 men have been raped in their lifetime.

·         Approximately 80% of female victims were raped before the age of 25, and almost half before the age of 18. About 35% of women who were raped as minors were also raped as adults compared to 14% of women without an early rape history.

·         1 in 4 women have been the victims of severe physical violence by an intimate partner while 1 in 7 men experienced severe violence by an intimate partner.

·         81% of women who experienced  rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner reported significant short and long term impacts related to the IPV experienced such as fear, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms, and injury, while 35% of men reported such impacts from the IPV experienced.

·         Women who experienced rape or stalking by any perpetrator or physical violence by an intimate partner were more likely than women who did not experience these forms of violence to report asthma, diabetes, and irritable bowel syndrome, as well as other health consequences. 

The full report and more resources are available here.

LIZ CLAIBORNE’S 8th ANNUAL “IT’S TIME TO TALK DAY” TAKES PLACE DECEMBER 8, 2011

What are you doing on December 8, 2011?  Around here at CAEPV – and across the country – people are “taking a moment to talk.”

CAEPV Member Liz Claiborne Inc. and it’s partners have been joining forces for It's Time to Talk Day annually (for eight years now) as a way to encourage greater public dialogue about domestic violence. The Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence is proud to be one of those partners.

Around the country, talk radio, government officials, domestic violence advocates, businesses, schools and the public-at-large take a moment - or more - to talk openly about an issue that affects nearly one in three women at some point in their lifetime. In fact, millions of talk radio listeners around the country were reached with the message since the inception of It’s Time to Talk Day in 2004.

 Liz Claiborne is continuing their very successful partnership with Talk Radio News Service by sponsoring their annual “Talk Radio Row on Domestic Violence” at Liz Claiborne Inc. headquarters in New York City.  Leading national and local talk radio hosts will be conducting back-to-back interviews with guests on various domestic violence issues throughout the entire day. 

This year’s participants include Alan Colmes of Fox News Radio; Dr. Joy Browne of WOR Radio Network; Mark Riley of WWRL, New York; Curtis Sliwa of WNYM (The Apple), New York; Roberta Facinelli of “Doug Stephan’s Good Day;” John Fugelsang of “The Stephanie Miller Show;” Kevin McCullough of “The Kevin McCullough Show” and “Baldwin/McCullough;” Maria Bailey of “Mom Talk Radio;” Gary Baumgarten of Paltalk; Lionel of WPIX-TV, New York Channel 11 and LionelMedia.com; Barry Farber of Talk Radio Network and CRN Digital Talk Radio; Lisa Wexler of “The Lisa Wexler Show;” Ken Pittman of WBSM, New Bedford, MA/Providence, RI; Dr. Renee Kohanski of PodJockey; Dan Patterson of KoPoint and Ellen Ratner and Geoff Holtzman of Talk Radio News Service who will be broadcasting throughout the day to several hundred of the news service’s affiliates.

Joining the lineup this year will be representatives of college talk radio with WRHU, Hempstead of Hofstra University; WLIU, Brooklyn of Long Island University and WNEK, Springfield, MA of Western New England University in attendance. Included among those who will be taking live and recorded feeds from the event are Thom Hartmann of “The Thom Hartmann Show;” Dom Giordano of WPHT, Philadelphia; and Carole Marks of “A Touch of Grey” with several more to be announced.

TALKERS publisher Michael Harrison states, “‘It’s Time to Talk Day’ is certainly one of our most important annual events. It raises consciousness about a societal problem that impacts a frighteningly large segment of the population and it cuts across all gender, ethnic and demographic boundaries. There isn’t a spoken-word format that doesn’t find the topic of domestic violence applicable to its audience and extremely compelling. Most importantly, we get feedback each year that this radio row, upon reaching millions of talk radio listeners, really does make a huge difference in the lives of real people. It doesn’t get better than that. We are grateful to Liz Claiborne, Inc. for their public-mindedness in supporting such a valuable project.” Talkers.com will provide full coverage of the event.

You can make a difference by hosting an "It's Time to Talk Day" event in your community. For the past several years cities and organizations from around the country held various programs to raise awareness of the issue. Programs and events have ranged from big, organized efforts such as press conferences, walks and vigils, to creative projects such as plays, and lastly educational efforts were made to devote this day to teaching the curriculum at local schools. For event ideas for your community, click here.

We are proud to be part of this effort as ask you to “take a moment to talk” on December 8.  As our electronic billboards say,  perhaps you can start the conversation with co-workers, chat over coffee with friends, talk with your family over dinner, or simply talk with your children about healthy relationships.

Not sure where to start?  Liz Claiborne has great tips in their downloadable booklets on their Love Is Not Abuse website.  You can check them out here.

Join us in taking a moment to talk on December 8.  You may change – or save – a life.

Registration Now Open: Verizon Wireless "Train the Trainer" Webinar December 15, 2011

We are delighted to present our third webinar "Domestic Violence and the Workplace: Verizon Wireless’ Train the Trainer Model" -- an educational opportunity provided through the CAEPV HopeLine® from Verizon Webinar Series.

An audio/video recording of this webinar is available here:  https://calcasa.ilinc.com/join/mtwkhtz

WHEN:   Thursday, December 15, 2011
2:00 PM- 3:00 PM ET / 1:00 PM- 2:00 PM CT / 11:00 AM- 12:00 PM PT

WHY:      A recent survey of CEOs found that most believe domestic violence to be a serious issue, yet 71% did not believe it is a problem in their company. The reality is that approximately 21% of full-time working adults report being a victim of domestic violence.

This webinar will highlight the successful “train the trainer” program used by Verizon Wireless to address domestic violence at the workplace, and will show how other employers can replicate this model in other workplace settings. 

HOST:    Elva Lima, Executive Director, Community Relations and Multicultural Communications,Verizon Wireless

PRESENTERS:

·         Jeremy Bruce, Manager, Employee Relations, Verizon Wireless 

·         Rob Peirce, Manager, Employee Relations, Verizon Wireless

INTERVIEWER:  Kim Wells, Executive Director, Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence

An audio/video recording of this webinar is available here: https://calcasa.ilinc.com/join/mtwkhtz
For additional event information, visit:  http://www.caepv.org/about/program_detail.php?refID=73  

The CAEPV HopeLine® from Verizon Webinar Series is made possible by a grant from HopeLine® from Verizon.

Honor Our Voices - Children's Perspectives of Domestic Violence

Did you know that over half of the residents of domestic violence shelters in the United States are children? (National Network to End Domestic Violence, 2010).

A new, innovative online training program called Honor Our Voices (www.honorourvoices.org) aims to elevate children’s voices, so that service providers may better hear, understand, and respond to the children and families they serve.

Honor Our Voices is designed to provide the opportunity to see domestic violence through the eyes and voices of children. The purpose of this learning module is to create a multi-pronged response to increase the awareness and sensitivity of shelter advocates and other social service providers to the needs of children and suggest promising ways of enhancing services for children exposed to domestic violence.

Included in this learning module is a downloadable guide for practice and a digital library of short audio programs that highlight specific promising practices through the voices of children.

The project was created by the Minnesota Center Against Violence and Abuse (MINCAVA) and the Center for Advanced Studies in Child Welfare at the School of Social Work at the University of Minnesota, with support from the Avon Foundation for Women.

It is so important to give voices to the most vulnerable among us - and honoring the voices of children exposed to domestic violence is one

Domestic Violence and the Holidays - What Do You Say?

The holidays are coming and you will be around family and friends that you may not usually see. And what if you see something that you are concerned about? What if you think someone you care about may not be in a safe relationship?

Here is the big difficult question: "What do you say to someone if you are concerned that they may be in an abusive relationship?"

Here is one pretty good way that I've found to talk with someone -- granted this is my style and everyone has a different style, but it goes something like this:

"You know I really care a lot about you. I've noticed you haven't been yourself lately, and that (and you would fill in here the other things you've noticed -- for example, the person seems afraid of their boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife, has unexplained injuries, seems isolated, etc.). I would rather be wrong or have you mad at me for asking than ever have anything bad happen to you so I just have to check in with you and ask -- are you safe in your relationship?"

Because really, if you think about it, that is the point, isn't it? You WOULD rather be embarrassed or feel uncomfortable asking, or be wrong rather than have something bad happen to a friend of yours and not say something.

And -- so what if your friend tells you that he or she is fine?

Then say: "Hey, that is great. But if you ever decide you aren't ok, I want you to know my door is always open." And you may also want to add, "And if you were ever concerned that I was not safe, I would hope you would ask me the same question, right?"

Because the point is, if we really have one another's backs, we should be able to ask each other these questions. And then if you can, you may want to check in again with your family member or friend again in a few weeks just to see how things are going.

People don't always tell you right away when they are in a relationship that is not safe or good for them. It takes time and it is not easy.

For help or assistance anytime (or just to check things out), call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or check out http://www.thehotline.org. Or for those in dating relationships, check out the National Dating Abuse Helpline -- on the web at http://www.loveisrespect.org or at 1-866-331-9474.

It never hurts to ask -- and it may help change or save the life of someone you care about.

(And survivors....any comments or additional suggestions you have are most welcome! You know best what is helpful!)

RECORDING & RESOURCES AVAILABLE: “TELLING AMY’S STORY: A TOOL FOR ADDRESSING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN THE WORKPLACE” WEBINAR

In recognition of October as Domestic Violence Awareness Month, CAEPV held our second CAEPV HopeLine® from Verizon Webinar: “Telling Amy’s Story – A Tool for Addressing Domestic Violence in the Workplace” on October 26, 2011.

The documentary Telling Amy's Story follows the timeline of a domestic violence homicide that occurred on November 8, 2001. The victim's parents and co-workers, law enforcement officers, and court personnel share their perspectives on what happened to Amy in the weeks, months, and years leading up to her death.

HOSTS:

• Mike Mason, Chief Security Officer, Verizon
• Kim Wells, Executive Director, Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence

PRESENTERS:

• Jayne Mayer, Director, Employee Engagement, Verizon Foundation
• Yandira Melon, EAP Counselor, Verizon
• Angela Long, Director of Security, Verizon
• Alphonsus (Fons) Marcelis, Head, HRS Corporate Operations, The World Bank Group

The audio/video recording of the webinar as well as the associated resources are available here.

A Tale of Two Hospital Rooms

I was really struck by two news stories I saw this morning – and the stark difference between them.

Here’s the first one – “Iowa Couple Married 72 Years Dies Holding Hands, an Hour Apart.” This couple loved and cherished one another all through their lives…and died holding hands in the hospital. I think their story is a beautiful testimony to love and respect throughout a lifetime.

Here is the other story – “Pekin man in custody after double stabbing Tuesday.” In this story, a man allegedly stabbed his estranged wife and their son (in violation of an order of protection)…he is in custody and his estranged wife and son are both in the hospital.

A tale of two hospital rooms.  A tale of two relationships.  Both started somewhere with people who had promised to love and cherish and honor and respect one another. 

One ended with love and respect.

One ended with violence.

What is the difference?  Why does one person determine to treat those he or she loves with respect and kindness throughout life…and why does another person choose to frighten, injure…and perhaps even kill those he or she once pledged to love?

I don’t know.

I mean I know all of the hypotheses – cultural, sociological, psychological…the latest research. I know all of that.

But at the end of the day I am just overwhelmed by the difference in these two pictures of lives of real people. 

And I think that while the life of Gordon and Norma Yeager is rare….it is closer to what I think we all want to see – a life where people feel safe and secure with those who love them.

And I want to see the day that the life of Shane Rhoades’ estranged wife and child is rarer and rarer…

If you ever wonder if your relationship is as safe as it could be, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline anytime at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or take a look at their website at www.thehotline.org.

Telling Amy's Story - A Tool for Addressing Domestic Violence in the Workplace Webinar

In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, the Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence (CAEPV) is pleased to present “Telling Amy’s Story – A Tool for Addressing Domestic Violence in the Workplace.” This webinar takes place Wednesday, October 26, 2011 from 2:00 - 3:30 PM ET.

Domestic violence does not stop at the door when employees go to work. The CAEPV HopeLine® from Verizon Webinar Series is designed to help increase employer awareness of domestic violence as a workplace issue and offer strategies for employers to recognize and respond to it.

The documentary Telling Amy's Story follows the timeline of a domestic violence homicide that occurred on November 8, 2001. The victim's parents and co-workers, law enforcement officers, and court personnel share their perspectives on what happened to Amy in the weeks, months, and years leading up to her death.

This webinar will highlight how Telling Amy's Story has been successfully used at workplaces as a tool to educate employees and managers regarding domestic violence and how this success can be replicated in other workplace settings.

HOSTS:

Mike Mason, Chief Security Officer, Verizon
Kim Wells, Executive Director, Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence

PRESENTERS:

• Angela Long, Director of Security, Verizon
• Jayne Mayer, Director, Employee Engagement, Verizon Foundation
• Yandira Melon, EAP Counselor, Verizon
• Alphonsus (Fons) Marcelis, Head, HRS Corporate Operations, The World Bank Group

Registration closed on Monday, October 24, 2011. To view webinar resources, to view the recording after the webinar, and for additional information, visit:  http://www.caepv.org/about/program_detail.php?refID=72

To view "Telling Amy's Story," visit http://youtu.be/TsFv4DiPKFg

More Than One-Third of Americans Have Never Discussed Domestic Violence

Are you surprised by the results of this new survey by The Allstate Foundation? 

Even though domestic violence affects one in four women in their lifetime, more than one-third of Americans have never discussed the issue with a friend or family member. Three out of five believe that it is a difficult issue to discuss.

This month, The Allstate Foundation and the YWCA are joining forces to break the silence and raise awareness about domestic violence by launching a new campaign designed to spur conversation and make it easier to talk about the issue. Based on The Allstate Foundation's long-term commitment to helping empower women economically to end domestic violence, the campaign encourages individuals to spread the story of the Purple Purse – the Foundation's new national symbol for domestic violence.  

"What many people don't realize is that abuse can be financial in nature such as withholding banking information or controlling a partner's money or misusing her financial identity and ruining a person's credit. This occurs just as frequently as physical abuse," said Michele Mayes, Allstate executive vice president & general counsel. "We are rallying people behind the Purple Purse because it stands for economic empowerment and represents the center of a woman's financial domain. It's also meant to convey the message that it's okay to talk about it – in fact please do."

To spread the message about the power of the Purple Purse, The Allstate Foundation today launched www.PurplePurse.com. The website appears to be an online shopping magazine, but after scrolling down the page, the user will find a variety of information and resources specific to the issue of domestic violence and financial empowerment. The website serves as a tool to raise awareness and provides a safe and informative place for women to educate themselves. PurplePurse.com also provides a place for women to start a discussion about domestic violence.

"As the largest provider of domestic violence services in the nation, the YWCA has worked tirelessly to combat domestic violence," says Gloria Lau, CEO of the YWCA USA. "Our partnership with The Allstate Foundation to heighten awareness of domestic violence and launch PurplePurse.com is another meaningful step in our effort to end this horrible epidemic in our society."

To kick-off the campaign, The Allstate Foundation and YWCA, along with top bloggers, are organizing TweetUps in nine cities across the country. The events are planned in nine cities across the country, including Birmingham, Ala., Chicago, Cincinnati, Cleveland, El Paso, Texas, Los Angeles, New York City, Seattle, and Tucson, Ariz.

These events are designed to explain the story behind the Purple Purse, share information about the issue and encourage individuals to help spread the word about the campaign. TweetUp attendees will also have the opportunity to hear from a domestic violence survivor at each event. As an additional incentive to inspire more people to get involved, The Allstate Foundation will donate $100 for each TweetUp attendee, up to $10,000 at each event, totaling a $90,000 contribution to the YWCA.

Individuals across the country are encouraged to participate in the campaign and show their support by carrying a purple purse or bag throughout October, posting their favorite purple purse pics to PurplePurse.com and downloading the Purple Purse widget available on the website. This widget makes it easy to share Purple Purse content through social media and is designed to ensure that more people in need will be able to get information that can help.

Each year, The Allstate Foundation contributes more than $3 million in grants and programming to support economic empowerment for survivors and to help end domestic violence. Visit www.PurplePurse.com and www.ClickToEmpower.com to learn more.

About the Survey

The Allstate Foundation partnered with ORC International to conduct the research on domestic violence awareness. ORC International conducted telephone surveys among a national probability sample of 1,002 adults between September 22-25, 2011.

The sample was comprised of 501 men and 501 women 18 years of age and older, living in private households in the continental United States. The sampling error associated with a sample size of 1,002 is plus/minus two to three percentage points at a 95 percent confidence level.

So -- check out www.PurplePurse.com ...and keep on spreading the purple!

What Are YOU Doing For Domestic Violence Awareness Month? (Or…Where Is All The Purple?)

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

I realize it is also a month to recognize a lot of other really important issues -- most notably breast cancer.

But while you see a lot of "pink" around, do you see a lot of "purple"? (Purple is the color that represents domestic violence awareness in the same way that pink represents breast cancer awareness.)

I have seen pink mixers, pink bras, pink baseball bats, pink shoes, pink applesauce containers. . . you name it. But why not purple?

I have some guesses.

A long time ago, no one talked about breast cancer -- they kept it a secret, and somehow it was a "shame" and was somehow the fault of the person who received the diagnosis. But fortunately that has changed, and we no longer blame breast cancer victims. We call them survivors. And we honor them for their amazing courage. And we should.

Now -- with domestic violence, we are not exactly there. We are uncomfortable with it because we are not really sure what "causes" it, whose "fault" it is, what we should do about it, or how to even say something to someone. I don't know all the reasons. I just know this -- it is highly uncomfortable for us.

But put all that aside for a moment.

I think we can all agree that the one place everyone should be safe and secure is in their own homes where they should feel loved and cherished. And I think we can all learn a bit about how to be healthier in our own relationships (which is also a source of discomfort for us, I think) and also learn how to recognize if someone is in a relationship that is perhaps not as healthy or safe as it could be.

I am not sure it "matters" that I "get" everything about someone else's relationship. I am really clear that no one deserves to be hit. Or slapped. Or to have things thrown at them. Or to be intimidated. Or for their children to be afraid.

Maybe for Domestic Violence Awareness Month, it would be good if we could all do what 30 organizations and businesses in Central Illinois did on October 4.  They asked people just learn to talk about this -- not argue about it, not decide if it is a "men's thing" or a "women's thing" -- but just realize it is a thing that impacts everyone.

On October 4, many, many of those people wore purple. One of them told me she wore purple and asked people if they knew why she was wearing that color. If they didn't, she started a conversation with them about it. Isn't that great?

Spread the purple!!!!

(You can get more ideas for raising awareness and making a difference from this simple list of  "10 Things You Can Do About Domestic Violence.")

10 Things You Can Do About Domestic Violence

As we begin October as Domestic Violence Awareness Month, people have been asking me "What can I do about domestic violence? Is there something I can do to help?" Here is a short list of ideas. Certainly you can add your ideas or additions at the end:

1)  Join the Love Is Not Abuse Coalition and get involved in a growing, national grassroots movement of parents, teachers and ANYONE who cares about getting dating abuse education into every middle school and high school in the country.  Go to http://loveisnotabuse.com/web/guest/who-we-are  to learn more.

2) Find out more about domestic violence. Go to http://www.clicktoempower.org/ and see the stories of survivors and what made the difference for them.

3) Go to http://whatwedid4love.com and support the National Domestic Violence Hotline by purchasing these pieces by Sueanne Shirzay and other artists.

4) Learn about how domestic violence impacts your workplace by visiting http://www.caepv.org/.

5) Remember the National Domestic Violence Hotline Number: 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or http://www.thehotline.org/. You can call to help others or yourself.

6) Donate your old cell phone, batteries, or chargers (any brand) at any Verizon Wireless store or use free mailing label http://aboutus.vzw.com/communityservice/Shipping.html.  Learn more about the HopeLine from Verizon program at http://aboutus.vzw.com/communityservice/hopeLine.html

7) Learn to talk to your kids about healthy relationships by downloading tip booklets from http://www.loveisnotabuse.com/.

8) Try to understand what happens in domestic violence and how it impacts people. Check out http://www.domesticviolenceworkplace.blogspot.com/. And comment!

9) Don't ask "Why would that victim go back?" ask "Why would a person hit or abuse someone they love?"

10) Be safe, healthy and happy in your own relationships. Because you matter. And you deserve it. And you are very, very precious.

New Survey Finds 43% Of Dating College Women Have Experienced Abusive Dating Behaviors

CAEPV Member Liz Claiborne Inc has revealed the findings of their recent study of dating abuse among college students. The results? Dating violence and abuse is more prevalent on college campuses than previously believed.

The survey, “Liz Claiborne Inc.’s Love Is Not Abuse 2011 College Dating Violence and Abuse Poll,” was conducted by Knowledge Networks to address the lack of data on dating violence and abuse among college students. Knowledge Networks interviewed 508 college students including 330 women and 178 men for the study.

According to the findings, a significant number of college women are victims of dating violence.

• 43% of dating college women report experiencing abusive dating behaviors including physical, sexual, tech, verbal or controlling abuse.
• Nearly 1 in 3 (29%) college women say they have been in an abusive dating relationship.
• More than half (57%) of college students who report experiencing dating violence said it occurred in college.

The results also show that college students generally do not know how to help their friends, or themselves, get out of abusive relationships.

• 58% of college students say they don’t know how to help someone who is a victim of dating abuse.
• 38% of college students say they don’t know how to get help for themselves if they were a victim of dating violence.

While many of the controlling behaviors overlap between high school and college students, other behaviors are specific to college students. For example, 11% of respondents were prevented from going to study groups, 8% were told whether to live on or off campus and 7% were told exactly which classes to take.

Our friends at  Love Is Respect and Break the Cycle have joined together to college students - and those who care about them - the tools needed to identify college dating abuse and address it.

On the website of Love Is Respect – the National Dating Abuse Helpline they’ve added a brand new section to arm students with knowledge.  You can locate it at http://www.loveisrespect.org/LC_study_pdfs/SafetyPlan_College_Students.pdf

College students - you can download the Liz Claiborne Inc. study, plan your safety, find info for helping a friend and brainstorm ideas to end violence at your school. We encourage you to download and spread these documents around your campus.

Teachers and parents — are you looking for a way to teach dating abuse info to your college students? The Love Is Not Abuse college curriculum is available online, free at www.loveisnotabuse.com/web/guest/curriculum.

Still have questions? You can call Love Is Respect – National Dating Abuse Helpline anytime at 1-866-331-9474.

It's Time to Talk: (un)Healthy Relationships. (un)Recognized.

On Tuesday, October 4, 2011, the Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence, Radio Bloomington and other community organizations throughout Central Illinois are co-sponsoring "It's Time to Talk Day" to bring awareness to the important issue of domestic violence. This year's theme is: "It's Time to Talk: (un)Healthy Relationships. (un)Recognized."

Events focus on the truth that anyone of any background can find herself or himself in an (un)healthy relationship and it is important that we recognize what an (un)healthy relationship looks like. Statistics show that domestic violence, dating violence, sexual assault, child abuse, and elder abuse occur in every demographic.

Local CAEPV members and community partners will participate in "It's Time to Talk Day" in the following ways:

·         Local governments, universities, colleges and workplaces will issue proclamations of "It's Time to Talk Day" and encourage citizens to take a moment to talk about domestic violence.

·         A news conference to announce "It's Time to Talk Day" will be held at 12:00 Noon October 4 at Second Presbyterian Church in Downtown Bloomington, Illinois.

·         The 11th Judicial Circuit Family Violence Coordinating Council presents "It's Time to Talk: Compassion Fatigue. (un)Recognized." at Second Presbyterian Church in Downtown Bloomington.

·         The Town of Normal is asking employees and citizens to be a part of the second annual "Purple Tie Initiative" and wear a purple tie (or any item of purple clothing) to support victims and survivors of domestic violence in our community and to raise awareness that domestic violence is "everybody's business."

·         Soroptimist of Bloomington-Normal is hosting a Lunch & Learn training for parents at Lancaster's Fine Dining in Downtown Bloomington.

·         Verizon Wireless Midwest Region and community partners are holding a HopeLine cell phone drive throughout Bloomington-Normal to collect no longer used cell phones, batteries and accessories. The donations will be used to support victims of domestic violence.

Other "It's Time to Talk Day" projects and events include:

·         Distributing educational materials in workplaces

·         Distributing domestic violence awareness brochures to clients

·         Holding seminars for employees

·         Providing information to employees via the Internet and Intranet

·         Writing informational articles for employee newsletters

·         Working with local schools to share the message about safety and wellness

·         Providing Public Service Announcements and radio interviews on Radio Bloomington stations and television interviews on WMBD-TV31 “LIVING WELL” with Meg Marshall

·         AND MORE!

For more information, visit http://www.caepv.org/about/program_detail.php?refID=69 or CAEPV’s Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/CorporateAlliancetoEndPartnerViolence .

For information on Liz Claiborne’s National “It’s Time to Talk Day” taking place December 8, 2011, visit the http://loveisnotabuse.com/web/guest/annualevent .